Mindfulness

I am not sure I fully understand what mindfulness is and am curious to know more about it. My mind seems to be full most of the time! BBC Radio 4 programme Woman’s Hour talked a little about it last week and my parents always stressed that I should be mindful of others.  Google presents many ideas and tips for mindfulness, many of which involve sitting meditation. However, in the last two weeks, the horses – and one in particular - has highlighted what mindfulness means for me.

He arrived as a frightened rather anxious two-year-old with a well-reinforced instinctive fight or flight response to everything. With every move I made and he either pawed the ground, reared up or fled if he could. My usual 20-minute morning routine of mucking out and feeding went out of the window. I needed to connect with this chap quickly, reassure that him he was safe and there was no need to be anxious. Our natural instinct is to talk, but of course words are useless for an animal with no verbal language.

I leant over the stable door and watched him; in my mind I asked him what he needed. I noticed his breathing deepen and slow and his head lower, and I concentrated on noticing every little muscle movement. I matched his slow breathing and low head and thought only of what might increase his relaxation. In a very short space of time (I discovered later), the horse in front of me became much quieter, with a softer eye, and to my mind very relaxed. I felt relaxed as well and at the same time renewed. I left the stable and resumed my usual morning rush around, getting home chores done before the school bus run and work.

Over the next few days I did this every morning and night, and even during the day if I was at home. Each time I went into the stable with this young horse, I left my usual rush outside the door and only focussed on making contact with him. By day three he was happy having two years of knots brushed out of his mane and tail and his feet cleaned. I found I was looking forward to stepping into his world and enjoying the moments with him. Strangely, the time I was spending on the routine was getting less each visit and yet we seemed to be having much more connection and communication in those moments.

After a week we were walking out and about and he was grazing the roadside as if he had never had a moment’s anxiety in his life. After two weeks his confidence was so restored he was able to go out in the field with an entirely new group of horses and became part of their herd in minutes.

Reflecting on what I have learnt from the experience: it was the point at which I stopped thinking about all the things I needed to do AFTER seeing to the colt, focussed solely on him and was mindful of our time together, that our connection grew, and he allowed me to groom, clean and lead him. Once my concentration was focussed in the moment on him I was able to get all the routines completed in a very short time. Horses are really great at getting us to be mindful. I believe we all can waste so much energy each day thinking about the next job rather than concentrating on now.

Even if you don’t have a horse to help you, you can practise being mindful – for instance, while you’re washing up. Instead of standing at the sink and thinking about tomorrow or yesterday or whatever, just concentrate on washing up! Think about the feel of the water and the temperature and the shape and texture of what you are washing and notice every small detail about it. It is very grounding and I believe that is my kind of mindfulness!

This Mum is mindful of her newborn as the foal is mindful of her Mum!